Writing stories in a comic-book way versus traditional prose

[DocQuantum]

Whenever I'm writing a story and rereading it, I realize that much of the time my writing style is mostly exposition, which is common in prose but rare in comic-books. In comics you usually get most of your exposition in the form of thought balloons or word balloons. It makes sense on the comic-book page, which always needs to be as dynamic as possible, but I find it hard to write or rewrite this kind of exposition in the form of a character's thoughts. It just doesn't flow as much.

I'm writing a scene in which Superman is flying through outer space alone, and I know he should have a running commentary, but for the life of me I don't know how to make it work in the story, even though I think it should have those thoughts so it has more of a comic-book feel to it.

I think I'll have to reread some of Superman's outer space missions, especially the ones from the early 1970s, to get a feel for it.

Do any of you also struggle with making your 5 Earths stories read more like the comics we know and love?

[DocQuantum]

Okay, I've come to a solution for this in the story I'm working on: simply rewrite some of the exposition as thoughts, so the same information is conveyed, but in a more natural character voice. It's easier for me to do this in the editing process than when writing it initially for some reason. I guess you have to be in a certain mood for writing a character's inner dialogue.

[jonclark]

I've noticed that the lack of artwork also makes things different. A picture can really be worth a thousand words.

In a comic you can drop a small clue into a panel, but in prose you need to let the reader know the clue is there without hanging a big sign screaming "Important Detail" An artist can have the Unknown Soldier or Christopher Chance pick at their disguise in a few panels without it being obvious but as soon as you need to describe that action the reader realizes it is something to pay attention to.

In the same way you can have a group battle scene in a single panel that immediately conveys what several characters are doing. Trying to tell the reader the same information in prose might take a paragraph or more. Both the writer and the reader can take in the Fortress of Solitude more quickly in a panel filled with labelled objects than using words to convey the scene.

[dans]

I tried to write my last Bulletman/Bulletgirl story as if it were a comic book, with panels. Very tough, I gave it up halfway through the first chapter (about 4 panels worth!!!)

I agree with Jon, it is difficult to slip a clue into text in such a way that the reader doesn't notice it. I've also noticed what Doc is describing, sometimes when exposition is required, having the character think the words is a more satisfying alternative than simple telling the reader something. Even better if you have the chance to put it into a conversation.

Because we don't have art, sometimes it is hard to get that 'comic book' feel.

PS - one way to slip clues into text is to slip lots of clues into the text, but only a few are really meaningful. But to be fair to the readers, I think later on you should explain why one or two of them were false, and how the hero figured out that they were false, so the reader can extrapolate about the others. This can be very difficult. Why did the detective jump on the color of her nails but ignore the scent of her perfume?

[lawrenceliberty]

He could be recording his experiences via some dictation device in Supermobile.

[dans]

Good point, Lib - maybe he is going somewhere that is risky for him and he is just putting some reminders into the memory banks in case he loses his memory, or, in case he doesn't make it back to the Supermobile in a specified time, the computer is programmed to fly back to Earth, and transmit the message to whoever is on duty in JLA HQ.